Prayer for a Difficult Boss: What to Pray When Work Feels Like War

Nobody teaches you how to pray for a person who is trying to hurt you.

We know the verse. “Pray for them which despitefully use you” (Luke 6:28). It sounds beautiful on Sunday morning. It feels impossible on Monday at 9 a.m., sitting across from a supervisor who took credit for your work on Friday and questioned your attitude in front of the whole team an hour ago.

I know, because I sat in that chair. More than once, in more than one organization. And for a long time, my honest prayers about those bosses were not the kind you’d put on a greeting card.

But over the years, God taught me something about this kind of prayer, and I want to share it with you — along with the prayer itself.

Why Praying for a Saul Is So Hard

Here’s what I finally understood about the jealous boss. The Bible calls him Saul.

Saul didn’t hunt David because David did something wrong. He hunted him because David did everything right, and the crowd noticed. Scripture says that after the people sang David’s praises, “Saul eyed David from that day and forward” (1 Samuel 18:9). A tormented, insecure man with a crown — attacking the very person whose faithfulness was serving him.

When you work for a Saul, the command to pray for him feels like betrayal of yourself. Praying for him feels like excusing him.

But look at what David actually did. He never excused Saul. He dodged the spears, kept his distance when he had to, and refused to hand the man his life. And still — twice — when David held the power to end Saul, he spared him and called him “the LORD’s anointed.”

David figured out something most of us never do: you can pray for a man and still keep your shield up. Compassion and boundaries are not enemies. Forgiveness is not access.

What This Prayer Will and Won’t Do

Let me be honest with you, because this is where a lot of teaching on this subject goes wrong.

This prayer will probably not change your boss. It might — God does what He wants — but Saul heard David’s kindness with his own ears, wept over it, and went right back to hunting him. Insecurity that deep is between a man and God.

What this prayer will do is change you. It will drain the poison of resentment out of your own heart before it hardens into something that follows you to your next job, your dinner table, and your future leadership. It will keep you from becoming what hurt you. And it will put your case in the hands of the only Judge who sees everything done in rooms you’re not in.

That’s not weakness. That’s the wisest legal strategy in the universe: “Vengeance is mine; I will repay, saith the Lord” (Romans 12:19).

The Prayer

Father,

I come to You about the person You already know about. You see what is hidden. You heard the words spoken behind closed doors, and You know the difference between what is said about me and what is true.

I put my case in Your hands, and I take it out of my own — because You have said that vengeance belongs to You, and I have learned it was never safe in my hands anyway.

Keep my hands clean. When I am provoked, guard my mouth. When I am wounded, guard my heart. Give me the strength to keep doing excellent work as unto You and not unto man, so that whatever else is said of me, it may be said that I did not become what hurt me.

And Lord, I pray for him. You know how hard those words are. I don’t excuse what he has done — You don’t ask me to lie. But You see what I can’t: whatever fear, emptiness, or torment drives a person to tear down the people who serve them well. Have mercy on him. And release me from him — from the resentment, the rehearsed arguments, the debt I keep trying to collect. I resign as his judge. That seat was never mine.

If it’s time to stay, give me the strength to endure with wisdom. If it’s time to go, give me the courage to walk out with my integrity intact, trusting that You build futures in wildernesses.

In Jesus’ name, Amen.

Pray It, Then Get Wise

One more thing, and it matters: prayer and strategy are not opposites. David prayed — the Psalms are full of his cries about his enemies — and David also dodged, documented his innocence with the corner of a robe, built loyal allies, and left the palace when the pattern proved it would never change.

Pray like it depends on God. Then get wise like He expects you to.

If you’re walking through this right now — the jealous supervisor, the stolen credit, the whisper campaign, the impossible assignments — I wrote an entire field manual on surviving it God’s way: The Spirit of Saul: Surviving the Boss Who Wants to See You Fall. It covers how to recognize the pattern, understand the mind behind it, and use David’s actual playbook — excellence, restraint, documentation, allies, and knowing when to leave — without sacrificing your character or your faith.

You are not crazy. You are not alone. And this season is not the end of your story.

Finish your song.

Commissioner William Epps is an author and security leadership consultant. His books are published through E.P.P.S Method Publishing Co.